Chandler: You know, I don't think we brought enough stuff. Did you forget to pack the baby's anvil?
Joey: I'm telling you, it's gonna be worth it. It's a known fact that women love babies, all right? Women love guys who love babies. It's the whole
sensitive thing. Quick, aim him at that pack of babes over there. Maybe one of them will break away. Wait, forget them. We got one. Hard left. Alright. Give me the baby.
Chandler: It’s ok. I got him.
Joey: Come on, seriously.
Chandler: Oh, seriously, you want him?
Woman: Hello. Who is this little cutie-pie?
Chandler: Well, don't think me immodest, but... me.
Joey: Do you want to smell him?
Woman: I assume we're talking about the baby now?
Joey: Oh, yeah. He's got that great baby smell. Get a whiff of his head.
Woman: I think my uterus just skipped a beat.
Joey: What'd I tell you?
Woman: I think it's great you guys are doing this.
Chandler: Well, we are great guys.
Woman: You know, my brother and his boyfriend have been trying to adopt for three years. What agency did you two go through?
Chandler: That was a good plan, Joe. Next time we want to pick up women, we should just go to the park and make out. Taxi! Taxi!
Joey: Hey! Hey! Look at that talent.
Chandler: Just practicing. You're good. Carry on.
Both: Wait, wait, wait!
Woman: Hey, you. He's just adorable.
Chandler: Can you tell him that? Because he thinks he looks too pink.
Woman: So what are you guys out doing today?
Joey: Oh. We’re not out! No, no. No. We're just two heterosexual guys hanging with the son of our other heterosexual friend doing the usual straight-guy stuff.
Chandler: You done?
Woman: Oh, there's our stop.
Joey: Get out of here! This is our stop.
Woman: You guys live around here too?
Joey: Oh yeah. Sure. We live in the building by the, uh, sidewalk.
Chandler: You know it?
Joey: Since we're neighbors and all, what do you say we, uh, get together for a drink?
Woman: So, uh, do you wanna go to Markel's?
Chandler: Oh, sure, they love us over there.
Woman: Hey, where's your baby?
Both: Ben! Ben! Ben! Ben!
Chandler: That's good. Maybe he'll hear you and pull the cord!
Joey: Stop the bus! Hey! Hey, there's a baby! Wait, wait, wait!
Chandler: Come on! Pick up, pick up!
Chandler: Hello, Transit Authority? Yes, hello. I'm doing research for a book, and I was wondering what somebody might do if they left a baby on a city bus.
Yes, I realize that would be a stupid character.
Joey: Hi. Here's the deal: We lost a car seat on a bus today. It's white plastic with a handle and it fits onto a stroller. Oh, and there was a baby in it. He wants to talk to you again.