Nice try, buddy.
Good hustle out there.
Look at the bright side. At least you got some closure. She's made her choice, and you can finally move on.
Screw that. This ain't over.
You sat here, in this very booth, and you said
I don't care what I said. This is gonna happen. She can't say it's not meant to be. It is meant to be. And you
know why? 'Cause I mean it to be.
Ted, she is going on that camping trip. Dude, barring some act of God, Robin's gonna be with Sandy this weekend.
Fine. If an act of God is what it takes, then an act of God it is.
What are you talking about?
I'm gonna make it rain.
I can't let Robin go camping with this guy. So how do I keep that from happening? Simple. I make it rain.
Ted, do you want me to slap you again? 'Cause I kind of enjoyed it the first time.
I might be crazy right now. No, you know what? I am definitely crazy right now. But I have a plan. That girl you
used to go out with, Penelope. Wasn't she getting her PhD in Native American culture?
Are you still in touch with her?
She's gonna teach me how to do a rain dance.
Did you just say a rain dance?
A rain dance?
A dance to make it rain.
Ted, this is funny. Still funny. Still And now it's sad.
Hey, Penelope, you sure I'm doing this right?
I think so.
Does it look anything like a real rain dance?
I think so.
Hey, Penelope, have you ever actually seen a rain dance performed?
I've read extensively on the subject. First-hand accounts, theoretical criticisms, anthropological...
Have you ever seen a rain dance?
I've seen a film strip.
Terrific. Look, I should run. I'm getting brain surgery from some guy who's seen a couple episodes of ER. I can't believe
this. We've been up here for the past hour making complete asses of ourselves.
What do you mean 'we', white man?